5 Canned Oyster Brands Ranked Worst To Best

The canning process has been a boon to shelf stability and long-term storage. Even if you believe some canned foods are too expensive, you probably understand that a can of oysters is going to last a lot longer than a platter of fresh ones. However, there can be a certain stigma attached to using canned goods. At least I was always led to believe that a canned version of something would automatically be lower quality than the so-called real deal. So, if you're anything like me, you would probably never assume that one of the best ways to buy and serve oysters is from a can. Doing the taste test for this article certainly gave me something to think about in that regard. The quality of canned oysters was way higher than I naively expected.

Beyond shelf stability, these canned oysters were actually pretty affordable compared to the market price for fresh ones. If you're planning on making a seafood chowder or a shellfish pâté of some kind, there is no real difference between a good canned oyster and a good fresh oyster. In fact, with the canned variety, you don't have to bother with cleaning, shucking, or deshelling. All the work is done for you. The pros just keep adding up. I took it upon myself to sample some canned oyster brands available in my area to let you know which ones are as good as fresh, and which ones should've been left to low tide.

To say I was trepidatious about getting into canned oysters would be an understatement. I live on the East Coast and am surrounded by fresh seafood. I had never really considered canned oysters beyond using them in a soup or chowder. I was afraid of bad textures and overpowering flavors. Clocking in at the bottom of this tier list, Geisha Whole Oysters in Water unfortunately lived up to my negative expectations.

The oysters in the Geisha can were covered in a grey membrane. Now, that says to me that the oysters are absolutely real, however, being canned turned the natural webbing into a slimy film that really hindered my ability to pull a single oyster from the container. Once I actually got an oyster into my mouth, the texture was all different kinds of wrong. It was mealy, crumbly, and altogether unpleasant. Granted, one does not usually spend much time chewing oysters, but a good oyster should not have a texture akin to overcooked quinoa. The extraordinarily mild flavor just put a pin in this one for me. There was absolutely no upside to this product. 

Great Value is Walmart's house brand of products, and I am always interested to see where it falls in these rankings because the quality of its foods can vary wildly. The Great Value Pumpkin Pie came in dead last, but its Clam Chowder is a soup worth eating repeatedly. Great Value is consistent in its inconsistency. I was surprised to find that Great Value does not have a brand of plain oysters, canned or otherwise. The only oyster product that Great Value seems to produce is its Smoked Oysters Packed in Oil.

The can appears to have been designed to facilitate hors d'oeuvres. The packaging depicts a cracker and cream cheese base for the oysters, and the pull-top cans make accessing the oysters much easier. No stringy membranes or extra-large oysters to make plating and tasting difficult here. 

I think that these oysters could taste fabulous under the right circumstances. Honestly, if this were an article about which oysters would do best for an appetizer, Great Value would probably rise to the top. On their own, however, these smoked oysters came with a bitter aftertaste, which is a shame, because it was so good at first that I ate my second bite before the aftertaste sent me reeling. The faux smoke flavor is just absolutely overwhelming on the back end. The initial flavor, convenience, and good texture were enough to keep Great Value from sinking right to the bottom of the list, but the aftertaste was noxious enough to prevent it from rising any higher.

I picked up these Pampa Smoked Oysters at my local Dollar Tree. If you've never considered shopping at a dollar store of any stripe, I highly recommend it. You can find surprisingly fancy foods at Dollar Tree, and a pretty robust frozen food section as well. Like Great Value, Dollar Tree can be a bit of a dice roll when it comes to quality. The fact that the oysters were canned put me a bit at ease, though, and taking this chance paid off.

Now, the oysters from the Pampa can were small. Very small. The can also contained some sliced veggies and a red chili, so the actual amount of oysters inside was limited. Still, it was more oysters than I would have anticipated for $1.25. The flavor of the oysters was top-notch. The initial brine flavor was a little dulled by the smoked nature of the meat, allowing the natural tenderness of the oyster to shine. 

However, like Great Value, the aftertaste took Pampa out of the running for the first spot. The red chili in this can is no joke. I had a coughing fit. I didn't expect it to be quite that hot. That's on me; if I had known the spice was so intense, I think I could have enjoyed these oysters a bit more. Being caught off guard and needing to palate cleanse before I could move on left this can square in the middle of the ranking.

If you had asked me before writing this article if Chicken of the Sea carried any products other than tuna, I would have said no. Finding this product was a bit of a chore, I will admit. None of my usual grocery stores had it in stock, despite what their websites said. If you end up wanting to try the Chicken of the Sea Whole Oysters, your best bet will be looking in local shops rather than big chains. From how fresh these oysters tasted, it could be worth the hunt.

Chicken of the Sea Whole Oysters held together nicely. This was the least messy can I had to work with, no oil and no disintegrating meat. It was refreshing. Not only were the oysters much larger than any of the other cans, they had the perfect texture, as well. 

The only reason the Chicken of the Sea oysters didn't make it to the very top of this ranking is the aftertaste. Granted, you're going to get a briny flavor when eating seafood, especially oysters. However, the aftertaste of the Chicken of the Sea oysters was very pungent. Thankfully, it didn't linger or last too long, but it was there. These oysters would be perfect to use in a variety of elevated recipes, but I wouldn't recommend just eating them as a snack.

The Bumble Bee brand is one that I've never really experimented with before. It's in the same aisle as Chicken of the Sea and StarKist, but has never particularly jumped out at me from the shelf. That could all be about to change after how well Bumble Bee Whole Canned Oysters performed in this ranking. These oysters are absolutely the best ones to whip up some sophisticated 3-ingredient canapes with, as well as the best ones for snacking on sans alteration.

While Bumble Bee didn't have the largest oysters overall, nor the easiest ones to remove from the can, this was definitely the best product. These oysters had the perfect texture. Soft without being mealy or rubbery. The flavor was a nice, light, seafood blast that left a really refreshing feeling on the palate. The only complaint I had with Bumble Bee Whole Canned Oysters is that none of them wanted to stay whole. Trying to keep one on a fork was a bit of a chore. However, when using oysters in a recipe or simply having a snack, there's no need for the meat to stay perfectly intact. Far and away, if I ever need another can of oysters, I'll be picking up Bumble Bee.

To keep everything fair for this article, I made sure to take exactly three oysters from each container to taste test. I took notes on not just the flavor, but also the texture and convenience of each brand. The prices for everything, save for the Pampa brand, were within a dollar or two of each other, so the price didn't affect the ranking at all. I went in to determine which oysters would be best on their own, without any additions or alterations.

For those concerned about food waste, fret not, I saved all the leftover oysters from the whole non-smoked cans and made my family some tasty New England clam chowder (substituting oysters for clams, in this case). The two tins of smoked oysters were divided up between my always hungry family and made for an impromptu hors d'oeuvre night. I was correct about the spicy Pampa: with a little cream cheese and a crunchy cracker, the spice level added a nice little zap to the bite-sized treat. This certainly won't be my last time purchasing canned oysters, now that I know just how versatile they can be.