This may be moved to Food News & Media, but it seems to fit on this board, where most of the etiquette conversations occur. A NYT Magazine article, Manners Manifesto. I like the distinction between rules that serve to separate and rules that serve to include. Or, as the author writes, "perhaps the way to distinguish useful etiquette from frippery is to discern which rules help us be good rather than seem good."
Still, I suspect a great deal of disagreement would find its way into a discussion of which rules are which.