This thread is being started separate and apart from the recent thread on sushi etiquette because I think that it touches on the whole wide subject of how enjoying and caring about what you eat carries over into enjoying life in all that it brings.
Deenso didn't ask questions about the right way to mix shoyu/wasabi because there was a fear of offending the chef (at least, I don't think that was the major issue), the question was asked because there was awareness of and a desire to learn more about how to connect with the aesthetic that comes behind the presentation and how to take the most enjoyment from the experience.
The people I have met who devote their lives to preparing and presenting meals or beverages of quality, no matter what the cost, whether high or low, have been without exception fascinating, opionated, passionate, willful and oftentimes, infuriating and insulting, but, always, always, fully alive and in the moment.
And, the vast majority of them, when approached at the right time, welcome and answer at length questions showing a sincere interest. The more you, the diner know about the thought that has gone into the preparation and presentation of the meal, the more you will be able to enjoy it.
Yes, pretension and hauteur is alive and well and thriving in all kinds of venues, but your own instincts and inclinations are your best guide and let your own good sense tell you whether your money has been well spent or not.