Restaurants & Bars

Coyote Flaco = Coyote Flunko


Restaurants & Bars 38

Coyote Flaco = Coyote Flunko

billyparsons | Aug 23, 2007 06:02 AM

So I finally get around to trying Coyote Flaco in Port Chester after hearing so many posters rave about it (not to mention the good Zagat reviews). What a joke.

Anyone that’s read my posts knows I’m a big proponent of “if you can’t handle the easy stuff, do I really trust you with the hard stuff?”

So I order my appetizer. A quesadilla with chicken, jalapenos and tomato, easy on the cheese. What arrives is a soggy tortilla with a cheese mixture containing what looked like melted Kraft American cheese, onions and dried out chicken. Jalapenos, which were reminiscent of Taco Bell, were served on the side with a vinegar carrot medley. Indigestibly and incomprehensibly disgusting.

I later learned the cheese was a muenster & monterrey mixture. Nice. They don’t even know what muenster cheese is in Mexico. I’ll still bet it was Kraft American cheese slices though.

I asked the waiter “do you have any fresh jalapenos?” He pointed to the vinegary jalapeño/carrot mixture and said “right there”. I said no, “fresh jalapeños”. He snarled and walked away. I felt like throwing my chair at him. Man do I hate crappy ignorant service.

By the way, those disgusting vinegary “Taco Bell” jalapenos found their way on the check as an additional charge. Huh?

The simple quesadilla was so bad I couldn’t continue. But I did bang down 4 glasses of chardonnay. Wine was good and at $5 a pop, I would never have complained unless the food wasn’t so crappy.

Now, I know I’m gonna get some slack from posters saying “you judge a place on ordering a single quesadilla?”. “Billy, you’re an ass for not trying something better!” Please spare me. A Mexican restaurant that can’t make a proper quesadilla without Kraft cheese is like a Japanese place that can’t make white rice. It’s not brain surgery.

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