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Restaurants & Bars 13

Clancy's Crab Broiler - PK's Review

PoetKitty | Mar 7, 200605:33 PM

Yes, I admit, it's terribly unfair to write a Clancy's review on the heels of the Providence seafood-dream meal, but I hit this place a few weeks back and have been meaning to send out a Warning. It's because I care, Chows, I really really do.

Place: Clancy's, Monday, 2/27 - 7:00 PM
Myself + 1 guest (The sweetest, cutest salsa-dancing girl evah)

Ratings in brief:

Ambiance - C+
I knew it would be casual, but I'm really not into the sawdust on the floor. Still, it's a large comfy space, and I appreciate the illusion of privacy.
Service - C+
Not bad. Not really good, but nothing horrendous to report. And the cute host was hitting on us, so at least he had good taste ;)
Food (Taste) - D
They would have failed miserably if not for the fried dough with honey butter. Yes, it's the little (fried) things that always save the day.
Food (Presentation) - D
No extra effort here, and in some cases, the food actually looked UNappetizing.
Wine/Drinks - N/A
No drinkies for me, so in all honesty, I can't rate 'em.
Value - F
A ridiculous amount of money for barely edible food. BOO.
Overall Experience - D
Again, I have those little doughy morsels to thank for an otherwise miserable meal.

I feel the need to mention I'm really not a food snob. I love ethnic holes and dive cafes just as much as a frou frou sceney gourmet eateries. Chow is where it's at.
I know you understand.

So when Angie - my dear Glendale dwelling girl - asked if I could meet her at a locale crab hut, I was all smiles. Seafood! Splendid. It can't be THAT bad, right? I mean, it's not Red Lobster.
Oh, if only . . .

The place is rather large and very casual - they weren't even half full, but it was a rainy Monday evening, so I wasn't alarmed. We snuggled into a booth and looked over the menu - lots and lots of standard options. Various fish + sauce combos, a raw bar, and oodles of crab/lobster. I had high hopes. Well, REALISTIC hopes.


OK, so I'm harping, but I like to dwell on the positive. I really did dig the fried carb-clusters and honey butter they served, and in hindsight, should have just buried my face in the basket and gorged away.


Just soda for us girls - for some reason, I figured it'd be a bad idea to get liquored up and sail down the rain-soaked freeways.
My soda, by the way, was almost flat. Awesome.


I had the lobster bisque. At least, that's what I ordered. What I received was a pureed mess of salty broth and tomato-esque flavor. I have to believe there was lobster in there SOMEwhere, but since the highlight were the little oyster crackers, that might be a pipe dream.

Ang had a house salad - all iceberg ickiness with a runny oily vinegar something or other. Not impressive.


I wanted lobster, friends. So badly I didn't even eyeball prices and the like - I figured a nicely steamed lobster tail would be a safe and yummy route.
In retrospect, maybe I was drunk.
The lobster tail was rather small, over-cooked, weeks away from fresh, and flavorless. Even the melted butter was disgusting. My two sides were a plain baked potato (overcooked - shocking!) and a melange of corn and peppers - also lacking any real tastiness or appeal. The whole thing tasted like an oily, rubbery mess.

Ang had an ahi tuna fillet, medium rare (yet looking more like medium well) with a pepper crust and some nasty steamed carrots and broccoli, along with yellow rice. Yuck. Really, truly, a world of yuck.

The damage for 2 sodas, a salad and a soup, plus 2 entrees?
$65 before tip.

Never, EVER again, and if I impart no other wisdom on ye, my beloved Chows, drive past this bastion of nastiness from the sea AT ALL COSTS.

Thank you, and good night.

Clancy's Crab Broiler
219 N. Central Ave.
Glendale, CA 91203

Ciao, 'Hounds,

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