Food Arts magazine presents the newest in new for expectant mothers who—in addition to being burdened by baby—are burdened with excessive wealth. All you have to do is check in to the Westin Kierland Resort & Spa and request the Bundle of Joy Babymoon Package. Voilà! You’ll find yourself pampered 24/7 by a “Cravings Chef” who will do stuff like bring a full-on rib-eye steak breakfast with grilled onions to your room at four in the morning. You’ll also pay $759 for the first night, and $399 for each additional night.

In case you can’t wait for the Cravings Chef to bring your pile of meat and cheese and whatever else to your room, you’re also equipped with an in-room make-your-own-sundae bar so you can just slap together a big pile of sugary crap the second your body demands a sacrifice. W Hotels provide a downscale equivalent: Expectant mothers can order “Womb Service” (har!), which offers ice cream, hamburgers, pickles, nuts, grilled cheese sandwiches, etc. etc. etc. And the practice is on the rise at other hotels, too.

Not having carried a baby to term, it’s hard for me to weigh in on the process. But there seems to be something a little condescending about presuming that not only are pregnant women absolute crazy slaves to their bodies’ demands for high-fat food, they are also so emotionally unbalanced they can be hornswoggled into paying the equivalent of a serviceable used car for one night of abandon.

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