“The following events are real and not intended for the faint of heart,” writes Tara on her blog Seven Spoons. She is mourning a loss in the family. “After serving valiantly for seven long years,” she tells us, “my KitchenAid Stand Mixer may have beaten its last batter.”

The calamity struck unexpectedly, without any warning of illness or decline. “Cream together butter and sugar. Such simple words of action, the mantra of any seasoned baker, little did I know that they would spell such tragedy.”

But tragedy they did spell, for Tara and her KitchenAid that fateful afternoon.

The estimated time of death was 3:21 p.m. … My dear Sean, fan of the Mixer, has promised to find a specialist to assess the situation. In the meantime, its brother, one Mr. Burr Coffee Grinder is holding vigil on the counter. The Mixer is also survived by Food Processor and Artisan Blender. We still have hopes to one day expand our family to include Ice Cream Attachment.

Condolences may be submitted at Seven Spoons.

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