What Should You Do If A Guest Arrives Late To Your Dinner Party

Hosting a dinner party is a balancing act. From planning and timing your dishes to fostering conversation and creating a welcoming environment for guests, it's an undertaking that requires the utmost attention to detail. And that's even if everything goes to plan. But when does that ever happen? If you're not missing an ingredient or accidentally taking a dish from charred to burnt, sometimes your guests don't show up on time. 

So, what should you do if a guest shows up late? To get some insight, we spoke with Nikesha Tannehill Tyson, an etiquette expert at The Swann School of Protocol Shreveport and the author of "Going Public." "Late guests should be invited to the table, they can begin with the course that is being served," she tells Chowhound. Doing so will prevent a mismatched serving schedule and help guests both late and on time to feel better incorporated into the evening. Hosts should also be clear in indicating the schedule and pace of the night when sending invitations. This will help prevent any confusion for guests.

A tardy guest can interrupt the flow of a dinner party, there is no doubt about that. If you would prefer to make your plans — and expectations of guests — clear, you can indicate the order of events on your invitation. For example, if your event starts at 6:30 in the evening, with dinner being served at 7:00, and you would prefer as few interruptions as possible, indicate within your invitation that your event begins promptly at 6:30 and that dinner will be served promptly at 7:00 pm. Doing so will give guests a clear indication of when they should arrive.

But what should you do if you're the late guest? First and foremost, you should try and gauge exactly how late you will be. If you're only expecting to be about 10 minutes late, a notice might not be necessary, as there is usually about a 15-minute courtesy window for party-goers to arrive. However, if you're running further behind than that, you should notify the party's host as soon as possible with a call or text. Additionally, you should indicate to your host that they ought to go ahead and proceed with the dinner so that you do not unintentionally delay the proceedings. However, if you are expecting to be an hour or more late for a dinner party, it might be best to forgo the event altogether, and instead send apologies so as not to cause an inconvenience. 

But what about arriving early? Etiquette expert Nikesha Tannehill Tyson doesn't encourage that either, telling Chowhound that "this could be the time the host is putting on the finishing touches for the party." However, she also notes that "[a] gracious host receives guests with a smile whether they are early or late." After all, acting as a good host means making your guests feel welcome and at ease even in some pretty complex situations. All guests should be greeted with a warm welcome, including those who arrive before the party begins. This may be not easy if you find yourself busy setting the table or taking a dish out of the oven. However, easing early guests into your party doesn't have to be an anxiety-inducing task. 

There are several ways of handling early-comers to a party. You might find it helpful to set up a few books, magazines, or photo albums on your coffee table and offer your guests a seat and a drink while you complete the last of your preparations. Alternatively, if your guests are in a helpful mood, you can give them a small task, such as lighting candles, to complete while you get to work. What is most important is to help your guest feel at home, so it will be best to guide your approach based on their inclinations.