The moment that most of us saw the Long John Silver’s TV ad for $2.99 “lobster bites,” we knew that something was up.

And, sure enough, the Maine Lobster Promotion Council is steamed about the ads, which tout “real langostino lobster”—a.k.a. “real hermit crab.”

Even Senator Olympia Snowe (R-Maine) is getting into the mix:

In a Sept. 25 letter to Andrew von Eschenbach, who was then acting FDA commissioner, Snowe wrote that using the term langostino lobster ‘pollutes consumers’ appetite for real lobster’ and is part of a marketing ‘hoax’ that is hurting her state’s economy.

The best fun fact to be dredged up from this food fight: As recently as 2005, the federal government allowed the term “langostino lobster” to be used interchangeably with “squat lobster.” This, of course, suggests the inevitable musical accompaniment to this particular controversy …

Boys in bikinis

Girls on surfboards

Everybody’s rockin’

Everybody’s fruggin’

Twistin’ round the fire

Havin’ fun

Bakin’ potatoes

Bakin’ in the sun

Squat lobster!

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