A Very Merry Chrismukkah Menu
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A Very Merry Chrismukkah Menu

Lights up on December 2016. Somewhere a partridge is about to sing in a pear tree, a couple is about to fall in love on page 14 of the J.Crew holiday calendar and you’re scratching your head, wondering a) whether you’ve ever even owned a menorah and b) which items to serve at your Chrismukkah party.

Never fear, Chowhound is here.

Now, to be clear, a Chrismukkah party has the appearance of religiosity but is really hangover helper. Between the ‘kindling’ lights, spiced wine and deeply fried deliciousness, you’re in the midst of a decadent dream -- a religion all your own.

So go ahead. Have fun. Cue up the weird Paperless Post invite, dust off the Christmas hat, and get jiggy with it.

Your menu - Christian, Jewish, deeply no F****s to give - is below. 

Mulled Wine.

It’s warm, soothing, and a little tangy - not unlike the holiday season itself. Make a batch in your slow cooker during afternoon party prep and ladle it out all evening. 

Photo Credit: Kitchen Stories

Academy Sparkler.

You’re not particularly devout but let’s be real: you love a twinkle light. This cocktail is luminous in its own right, mirroring your space, and it’s damn good - brut sparkling wine, Pernod, allspice, berries, and oranges.


Smoked Trout Pate. 

For some of us (including this Pizza Bagel), Christmas is a celebration of the Feast of 7 Fishes - an evening for clams, sardines, and other salty - if mysterious - flavors. Add a taste of the ocean to your menu with a smoked trout pate.


Latkes. 

Latkes! The rush of the potato coming through the grater, the sizzle in the pan, the oil as it seeps onto the paper towel, the dollop of sour cream, the kick of the apple sauce as it hits your tongue - this is the stuff of holiday magic. Like a good playlist, no Chrismakkuh is complete without it. Best if served in real-time during your feast for equal parts performance and perfectly crisp results.

Mash Pos.

Need I explain?

Photo Credit: New York Times

Brisket.

An acquired taste for some but real delish for others. Ideally served by your grandmother in an apron from 1976 but if not, at least get her recipe.

Xmas Sugar Cookies. 

Sugar cookies are a love letter to the season; best if served at the night’s end with your feet on your friend’s lap.

Apple Cider Sufganiyot

Believe it or not - doughnuts have their place in the long scroll of history. Make sure to add sufganiyot (a Hanukkah-specific) donut to the encore of your meal.

Skillet Pear Cake. 

Ooo yeeee, ginger pear cake is the finale to your din. Eat it standing up in your kitchen or the next morning for breakfast with a cup of coffee. With beautiful burnt coloration, it’s highly Instagram-able on a lil china plate.


 

About the Author

Hi! I'm a writer, producer and storyteller. I'm the creator behind Yum Yum Fun - an experiential food blog at the intersection of adventure, memoir, and delicious eats. I've lived in Chicago, Baltimore, Rome, San Francisco and New York - and have used food as a means to explore them all. V excited to be part of the Chowhound editorial crew and for the #YYF trips ahead. Peep the adventures on IG: @rcpatrizio