My boyfriend and I went to a play last night in the east village area, and we felt like having thai food. So I did some research ahead of time and came up with Kai Kai Kai Kai on Ave A at Thompkins Square Park. It had so much potential...small, storefront place with a no-frills approach, a neighborhood favorite judging by the reviews on citysearch, cheap. So we went, and the place was beyond tiny, with three little tables. I saw that the entrees were in bins, buffet/cafeteria style, and was a little worried. I ordered a thai salad and chicken madsamon, he got vegetable red curry, and we both had thai iced tea. I asked for mine without rice, since I'm on a low-carb diet. (While waiting, I read about the name of the place. It means, "who buys chicken eggs," and is used as an illustration of the importance of pronunciation in the Thai language. It's said that if you can pronounce this phrase correctly, you have a firm grasp on the language. Neat, right?)
Anyway, the food was AWFUL. The portions were teensy, and I /like/ my portions to be on the small side. Since I didn't want rice, I got a small, shallow bowl with some overly creamy sauce, some potatoes and carrots that were mushy to the point of near-disintegration, and maybe 5 pieces of rubbery chicken, full of sinew and overcooked. No spiciness at all, and it was COLD. And the salad was horrible. I almost always order thai salads...the best one I've had is at Planet Thai, where they use a mix of greens and veggies, little strips of firm tofu, and grape tomatoes. This salad consisted of a pile of iceburg lettuce with some droopy bean sprouts and watery "peanut sauce" which was basically peanut butter. Nissim's food was perhaps worse. The sauce was bland, and the "vegetables" were: cauliflower, carrots, tofu, and textured vegetable protein. Yum.
We should have sent it back and left but just weren't in the mood...we were late to this play, and tired, and I just really hate sending things back; prefer just to not go again. But as we left, I told Nissim I had this urge to instantly go on Chowhound. I was reminded of the simpson's episode where the comic book guy sees a show and instantly goes to his laptop and types, "Worst episode everrrr." So that's how I can sum up my review of this place: "Worst Thai food everrrrrrr!"
p.s. I went back and looked at the place's "reviews" on Citysearch and they're clearly all shills. I hate that. >:(