Where I live, there are two kinds of newspapers: papers from NYC and local rags written by 20-year-olds on their first journalism gigs. The articles are typically inaccurate and completely lacking in experience and perspective.
A recent restaurant review of this variety was at least good for a laugh: girl reporter with date goes to new Japanese restaurant, prefacing the review with never been to a Japanese restaurant and I dont really like Japanese food, but thought I should review this place anyway. What?
When seated, orders plum wine to drink with dinner. Boy was that wine sweet. Yum. States plainly that she will not try sushi or sashimi. Ever. Yuk. Boyfriend is game, though equally inexperienced. Orders a big plate of sushi. Eats some. Not crazy about it. Then he eats the big bright green piece in one bite. Boy was that hot! Someone should have warned us! Date wouldnt eat the rest of the food. Reviewer commences to review her meal (noodles and teriyaki), but says she would never go back because of the hot-mouth food. She doesnt even find out what the green thing was!
Wow. How about a review of, say, Daniel, in which reviewer eats the pale yellow ball of cold grease that came with the bread?