While it’s clear that the Madonna/Guy Ritchie divorce is going to spill its bloody guts across the pages of tabloids for the next millennium or two, Ritchie may have already (and conclusively) won the gastronomic portion of the public relations battle.

The Material Girl was, according to the Daily Mail, something of a food tyrant.

“Guy apparently used to complain that she was giving her children an unhealthy attitude towards food: she banned sugar entirely, which made biscuits, ice creams and cakes objects of almost otherworldly fascination for her daughter Lourdes and their son Rocco. She also banned cheese, cream, salt and preservatives.”

Dining out was apparently just as much fun:

“Even when the pair went out for ‘romantic’ meals—and in the final two years of the relationship this was one of the few activities they shared—Madonna would generally refuse to eat anything. One associate said she doesn’t ‘trust’ the kitchens, even in Claridge’s and Nobu, to prepare food to her exacting standards.”

If public sympathy can (through the magical alchemy of the divorce process) be converted into a better divorce settlement, Guy may have figured out how to turn years of restricted eating into a handsome premium.

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