What will dining be like seven years from now? Judging by the results of Designboom’s Dining in 2015 industrial design contest, it’ll be dominated by a fear of germs, shut-ins who let their dogs drink wine, and projectile spices.

Among the weird futuristic visions, there were some practical ideas, including cutlery that fits on your pen-top, perfect for office lunches. If it’s ever produced, it should come with a plastic pocket protector in picnic-tablecloth plaid. And a lovely leaf-shaped spoon was a first-prize winner in the contest. Its creator says it is “designed with the wish that we think a great regards of dining more and more as human’s essential workings in the future.” Huh, OK. Thanks, Babel Fish.

Some designers appeared to be projecting a retro-futuristic vibe. Check out the salt and pepper shakers that seem to hover, thanks to magnets. Groovy.

Among the inventions that seem like good ideas at first but probably wouldn’t pass muster in a test kitchen, we must count the circular vegetable peelers and an umbrella-inspired cake cutter. And somehow I don’t expect to see this plastic-table-slash-medieval-punishment-device in use in dining rooms anytime soon, although it might come in handy for keeping the Thanksgiving children’s table in line.

My favorite is the dining room table that doubles as a marimba. I’m not sure what it has to do with the future, but it looks like fun.

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