Here’s the saucy teaser:
“I interviewed Arnell at his office in 2004. Never in the years before or since have I met a person so impressed with his own talents. That’s not very nice to say, I know, but bear in mind we’re talking about someone with a reputation for hitting his employees and making them do push-ups as punishment.”
The story establishes Arnell’s sense of self-regard and then sets it in sharp relief against his results vis-à-vis the failed makeover of the mammoth Tropicana brand and the confusing, sales-killing repackaging of Gatorade.
Next on Arnell’s hit list: getting Belvedere vodka to nickname itself “Belve,” which is dangerously close to Balki talk. Bercovici’s story could’ve been twice as long, as there are apparently a lot of contemporary Miller Clear Beer–esque marketing turkeys to be eaten and digested at leisure.