So, if the astronauts get Alain Ducasse and Emeril Lagasse, what do we pathetic earthlings get?

Well, if you’re lucky enough to fly BusinessElite on Delta, you get to sup on meals created by celebrity chef Michelle Bernstein. Delta and Bernstein offer such tempting treats as pomegranate-glazed lamb with pilaf, and grilled fish with sweet corn succotash and ancho lime butter.

Delta tells us:

[i]n addition to a refurbished personal dining menu, Delta’s enhanced BusinessElite experience will include: comfortable all-leather sleeper seats with 60” of legroom; a digital, on-demand entertainment system with an extensive movie selection, the ability to build a personal music playlist, a suite of video games, and in-seat laptop power outlets; and a cleaner, brighter cabin.

Don’t mind us plebes back in normal-people class—we’ll just starve in our cramped, boring, and apparently dark and dirty cabins. Or we’ll bring on some food from SkyMeals. This month, Health Magazine announces that you can order meals, such as shrimp and asparagas farfalle fra diavolo, or snacks, like chilled stuffed artichoke with prosciutto, from SkyMeals and have them delivered curbside in an insulated tote.

While the food can run you anywhere from $7.25 for vegetarian sushi to $29.95 for a European Brunch, it certainly seems cheaper than bumping yourself up to business class. However, in order to get these rather pricey meals, you have to be flying out of the L.A. area.

Other carriers are getting in on the “special food for especially rich fliers” plan. Lufthansa will be offering two—smoked marlin with beet gelée and air-dried beef from Leon from Juan Amador, holder of two Michelin stars. Singapore Airlines has snagged the profane Gordon Ramsay, and Air France trumps Lufthansa by offering meals created by Guy Martin, who has three Michelin stars.

I think I’ll just keep brown-bagging it. At least until I win the lottery.

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