Combining things that it is unthinkable to combine is the height of art in cooking. Ramen burgers, cherpumples, the lambpigcow (a side of Wagyu wrapped around 24 deboned quail, a dozen chickens, eight ducks, six turkeys, two lambs, and a pig)—they exist as the juxtaposition of things we want already, as individual elements, intensified by association. Last week at CHOW, Kim Laidlaw was testing donuts (recipes start here). As she was finishing up, she did something monstrous: She wrapped an apple fritter in a custard-filled donut, then glazed it with chocolate and paved it with sprinkles as subversively menacing as clownface. We spent—oh—10 minutes trying to think of a name monumental enough to describe a thing so weighted with desires of the id. Nothing seemed as right as referencing that other fantasy of conflated wants, the turducken. Ladies and gentlemen, say hello to the turducken of donuts, a cream-filled, double-fried, chocolate-glazed vector of desire.
Photos by Chris Rochelle