I've recently been invited to my good friend, Meg's, birthday celebration. Her boyfriend is planning it and sent the following request:
"Please bring veggie burgers, whiskey, veggie dogs, beer, veggie ribs, tequila, vegetables, ice, birthday presents/flowers. Not necessarily in that order. Oh, if you eat meat you can bring that too, no judgement! We will supply music, dancing, Meg, and guacamole."
Had Meg's other friends (who happily offered to throw her a party) planned this, this wouldn't have happened. The boyfriend swooped in and took over planning duties and then asked everyone to do the work for him once he secured the BBQ spot (his brother's house). The boyfriend is out of work and none of us are rolling in dough so a potluck BBQ was to be expected, but I believe the host should at least provide the basics (if you're throwing a party, you can buy ice for your guests).
I was planning on bringing flowers for Meg and a six-pack to share between me and whoever else. I will bow out of eating anything at the BBQ and dine out later. I am perturbed the boyfriend went about it in such a cheap and tactless way.
My question is: Do you think I should bring food and more alcohol and suck it up because Meg is a good friend? I feel as though I'm punishing Meg by not contributing to her night for her boyfriend's lack of etiquette.
A sub-question: After batting around party ideas between Meg and her friends and boyfriend, she decided she'd like to have a BBQ at the boyfriend's brother's. So, really, it was her idea. Is SHE at all responsible to bring any of the food/alcohol items requested?