Entertaining & Etiquette

I'm Taking the Food - No Invitation or Discussion

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Entertaining & Etiquette 47

I'm Taking the Food - No Invitation or Discussion

CyndiA | Dec 3, 2012 01:14 PM

I don't want to be too detailed . . . but here's the general scenario.

Party with young adults.

One YA brings a dessert which is delicious. I overhear person X ask to take home the leftovers (about half the dessert). YA dessert maker says she promised the leftovers to some friends who helped out. Thinking that's the end of the discussion I move around to do some clean up.

I notice person X kind of stalking YA but guess they are just chatting.

But . . . I see X ends up leaving with a huge cup of the dessert. I'd estimate four to five typical servings.

Same group - different gathering.

Meat is grilled in batches. Basically they are samples. So, everyone (17 total) kind of eyeball and take what would be a fair share until the last batch. Person X fills her bowl heaping with about a quarter of the final batch. I do not see her do this, but I do see her walking away and know she has left with her afternoon snack, because the napkin on top of the bowl is not large enough to hide the mountain of meat heaped up in the bowl. Again, I'm cleaning etc. and she's some distance away and headed off.

In addition to all this, X also makes it a point to talk loudly about the foods she doesn't like after having taken large shares of those foods (made by others, donated, or purchased and free to her). "This is just nasty," would be an example. "My Grandma makes much better cake than this." You get the picture I think.

On top of this, every YA in the group, at a minimum, picks up their empty plates, cups, napkins, and some help with wipe down and so on. Not X. I end up having to clean up her mess as she's walking off with the "good" food. Yes. She leaves her plate of rejected "not good enough for her" foods there for all to see.

Would it make sense to speak with her privately about this? I would say something light right on the spot, but I bascially pick up the host duties and only catch the aftermath. The other YAs would not want the food after it had been plopped on her plate.

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