Well I just completed the in-law weekend (posted in preparation for this a few weeks ago) where my parents met my future in-laws for the first time. Decided to go with my gut instinct and went to Hamersley's with the parents and it was just great. Requested a quiet table and sat in the front room (mom noticed how nice and quiet it was, v. satsifying). Dad (the picky eater) was very satisfied with his GIANT rib-eye steak and me and boyfriend v. satisfied with scallop special and Artic char dish. Also, excellent individual blueberry pies for dessert.
Also, tried Tosca on Chowhound rec.in Higham. This was really very good. Nice atmosphere and v. good food at more moderate prices than you'd get in the city.
Tried Jacob Wirth's too. Mom and Dad loved it (they had the Weiner Schnitzel), but I wasn't so crazy about it (had burnt honey glazed halibut--too sweet). Actually, I went there for a drink yesterday and it was fun for that, but I found the food to be too fancy and not so great.
SO thanks for the suggestions all!