Next Up: A Robot Chef That Can Find and Kill Sarah Connor

Have you been biting your lip with frustration, waiting for the day when robots would issue the orders to the cooks at your neighborhood fast-food restaurant?

Bite no longer.

The omnipotent and hyperawesome news site CNET (which, uh, owns CHOW) reports on a new robot-based system that promises to make your low-end dining experience far more efficient and creepy:

The vision system in Hyperactive Bob essentially scans the parking lot for incoming cars. It then cross-references traffic patterns against data about the restaurant—the bell curve of orders, the time of day, cooking times, the current amount of food in the restaurant’s warming bins—and issues cooking orders to the employees manning the grill or the deep fat fryer.

Next up: robots that tell customers what to order based on what looks good at every other table in the house; robots that tell waiters whom to wait upon based on the thread count of suits, designer labels of purses, and quality of haircuts; and robots that arrive wearing disguises in order to write snarky criticism of other robots’ restaurants.

Listen. And understand. That Hyperactive Bob is out there. It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you have been served a delicious hot meal.

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