Have You Seen This Farmer?

Say what you will about the pleasures of the farm (fresh air! lovable singing pigs!), all that wide-open countryside can get mighty lonely. That’s why a group of Welsh farmers are seeking their mates by posting personal ads on milk cartons, reports the Associated Press.

The ads—each of which features an oval photograph of a farmer under the heading “Fancy a Farmer?”—provide an address for a dating website where the lovelorn bovine wranglers can be contacted.

“Got milk? Got a date?” mocks the Associated Press’s London bureau. Oh, it’s just so easy to be ironic when you’ve got a city full of pubs stuffed with drunken women of uncertain virtue, isn’t it? These farmers are frickin’ lonely, as the article goes on to point out:

The ads are also a way of highlighting the low points of a dairy farmer’s hard-scrabble existence in Welsh communities like Carmarthenshire, where the cooperative is based 220 miles from London.

Farmers say they often feel isolated among the verdant rolling hills dotted with medieval castles.

‘It’s a beautiful environment, but in terms of actually trying to meet somebody it’s not particularly easy—especially when you have to wake up at 5 o’clock in the morning to milk cows,’ said the cooperative’s director Richard Kerr, who is happily married and not pictured in the ads.

Oh great! Sucker us in with a funny headline and then get us all depressed, why don’t you? It’s enough to put you off your milk.

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