Starbucks has actually managed to make their coffee worse.

Warning: Excessive use of quotation marks in this post.

I ordered an iced coffee this morning at my building's starbucks. I notice a promotion for new "ice shaken" drinks.

Stupid, I think. Can anything be worse than trendy coffee?

I am also asked if I want my iced coffee "sweet."

Ack. What the hell? I hate it when they change my routine. What is "sweet"?????? I have never been asked if I want "sweet" iced coffee. Visions of the south dance in my head. Er, no, I answer.

And then, to my horror, I watch their employee "make" my iced coffee with a faux plastic "martini shaker." It is served to me with this revolting cap of foam slowly oozing out of the top. Who invented this monstrosity? I am a third of the way through it and there is still foam everywhere. Gross gross gross.

The only thing that I ever order at Starbucks is iced coffee, because their other nasty concoctions are so off-putting. ACK.