I am looking for a decent martini. Here are my requirements:
(1) It should not be way too freakin' big. Enormous martinis may get a person drunk, but they get warm halfway through and can't be consumed with anything resembling dignity;
(2) It should be made with gin, vermouth, and the melted water from the shaker. That's it. No vodka. No cranberry schnapps and peppermint. God help us all, no chocolate; and
(3) It should be served in a dark room, preferably with wood wainscotting on the walls, preferably by a gruff old guy in a bad bowtie.
To help you out, so far the best contender is the Blue Bar at the Algonquin, but they fail test #1. Any thoughts? Should I just make one for my cranky old self in the privacy of my own home, or is there hope in Manhattan.