I need some guidance here. I am planning a surprise birthday cocktail party for my husband. I have invited his out of state brother who has a couple of kids (age 4 and 5 and unruly). I have mentioned that there will be no kids (my kids are in college), and would he consider having his kids at another brother's house (who lives not too far from husband and me), who also has a couple of young kids. I have offered my kids to babysit for all of their younger cousins at the other brothers house. The problem: his wife won't leave her kids with anyone, not even family, not even for an hour. So it appears that in the end we'll have a couple of kids high-jacking an adults only party with a guest list of about 30 people. What can I do to keep peace? My brother-in-law wouldn't dream of attending without his wife and kids.