Went to Cipriani last Saturday and had a hilariously awful experience. The interior is lovely but downhill form thereon in. Every 2 minutes we were treated to the smell of burning toast as they routinely carbonised little pieces of Ciabatta that they put in each tables breadbasket, Ours was black around edges. Ordered a bottle of Tignanello and they would only put it in tiny petrol forecourt glasses, they have nothing bigger. Beef carpaccio was tasteless over refigerated plastic meat with some industrial gluck spew on top which tasted of Heinx salad cream. £22 for this nonsense. Salad of half a mozzarella ball and 6 cherry tomatoes: £18. Obviously tinned soup of pasta and beans looked like dog turd and tasted , well, what can I say. Waiters were staggeringly incompetent, very poor English, totally haphazard. Head waiter came over and I told him in no unceratin terms this was rubbish food, not even mediocre. He said not to worry as my main of veal kidney would be "the best veal kidney in the world". I told him I would be the judge of that, and of course it was bollocks, a few lobes sliced wafer thin and mixed up with some muchrooms. One other main was a John Dory with asperges which was worse than Birds Eye boil in the bag. We decided to end it there and then. The bill for 4 came to £ 360 !!!! I refused to pay it, offered to pay for the wine and £100 for the food. In a defiant gesture we were thrown out, without having to pay. Good ! Got a cab to Petrus, managed to talk our way in, and had cheese and desserts only, with a bottle of Lascases 88 and Cos 86, and glasses of Yquem. Talk about an evening of 2 halves. As for Cipriani, it truly deserves to go bust, but it was depressingly full of tasteless rich people who are happy to be fleeced. They deserve each other.