Thanks all for the suggestions. I stayed at the Water Club for the five days I was there, simply for the convenience. All I can say is that it was "Ritz Carlton" prices with low end motel amenities! Filthy, stained chairs, bugs in my room, inoperable shower, broken furniture. I could go on about the service, but that's for the management to respond to. I took pictures so the management would not have any choice but to close that room, and possibly a few more.
Now to the food.
After a long trip and a mess of a room, I went to Bobby Flay's. I know, I was told to skip it, but my fiends raved about it. I should have listened to the chowhounds. Service by the more flamboyant bartender was nonexistent. Long wait for my martini, oysters that were meh, and one was actually bad, and a lobster and filet skewer that was over cooked and chewy. I might add that my food came so quickly that it was a rush job. Second martini took forever, so long that the guy next to me said something. The other bartender did his best picking up the slack from Mr. Bartender for the high rollers, men and couples. Single females should not bother sitting down at his bar. After traveling most of my life on business, it was obvious where his mindset was.
The next day was another long day, which included a good deal of driving, but I found a restaurant in Beesley's point to sit down and catch my breath. I can't speak to much of the food, since I ordered a Bloody Caesar and a dozen oyster's Rockerfeller. Good cocktail, good oysters, local and fresh, and wonderful service. Not cheap, but certainly a decent price. I'll go back there again. Patio bar was closed, but the view was great from my seat at the window.
I know, I spent too much time eating at the hotel, but circumstances didn't allow me to venture too much. I ended up trying Wolfgang Puck that evening, courtesy of a Housekeeping Department certificate for $50.00. While it didn't cover the tab, service was outstanding, I wanted a burger and not much else, but not only was the burger huge, accompanied by really fabulous bread and butter (I'm originally from Europe) but the salad on my plate, as well as the fries where just way more than I could eat, but excellent nevertheless. Kudos to the waiters who served me and made me feel so much better after a very emotional day. I even had the chocolate soufflé at the suggestion of the waiter. One of the best I've had.
The Old Homestead: some people may say it's expensive, but a single, small female dining alone would tell you there was value for that tab. Martini, 10 ounce filet, half a dozen oysters did not set me back as much as you would expect. The service was great, after my initial annoyance at being told there were no tables for one and seeing men, with no reservations, ( yes I asked them if they were walk ins) seated at the tables. I was seated at the kitchen counter, and found it entertaining and fun! The food was as good as I remembered it to be in NYC, and I would recommend the place. The hostess was very apologetic when I mentioned to her that single females, dining alone, are often even better tippers than men, and she should remember that next time a single female came in.
As to activities, well, except for some inconsequential gambling, I spent time on Brigantine beach, clean and nice. I also took a ride on the Fishfinder, a fishing charter, not to fish, but to experience what my brother had seen when he was alive. Wonderful owner, great first mate! The people who were fishing, kids included, had a ball!!!!! Lots of excitement, laughter and awe. Next time I will fish, and next time I may rent a house so I can cook the flounder I may catch.
I did not get to Whitehouse, or Knife and Fork, but will keep them in mind, since I am going back soon.
I did stop at a couple of beachside restaurants for oysters and fries, names elude me now, this is a long post.
On my way out of town, I stopped in Pleasantville, for dim sum and again, really good authentic food, good service, a place I would recommend for anyone who loves their dim sum.
Overall, Don't bother staying at the Water Club if you don't gamble, and ask if the rooms are habitable. The spa at the Water Club seemed not to be accessible by mere mortals, I went to the Borgata side for a manicure and hair appointment . So so. Nice people, not great results.
Btw, boardwalk was ok, but not what I expected. It may have been my mindset too.
Apologies for any spelling or grammar errors, I was in a bit of a hurry to post this, since you were all so timely with your suggestions.