It’s 2009 and it seems like every website in existence has done a piece about killing an animal. But look, this is what’s good about writers: They can be original! This piece by Jennifer Reese in Double X upends the I-Killed-My-Pet genre by giving it a big, fat yawn. So what’s the big deal, she asks?

Reese may have the upper hand on all the lily-livered slaughter virgins out there because her dad “put himself through college working at a slaughterhouse.” And—is this cheating?—her dad actually does the deed for her, but Reese gains cred for getting blood on her hands. The money line: “I’ve eaten a lot of chickens in my life, and they were all dead.” She refuses to anoint herself a model of virtuosity. The chicken was alive, and then it was dead. Now we eat.

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