Here in the United States, we’re languishing in the first toasty onslaught of summer, grasping thirstily for iced tea, Red Bull, or whatever boring old beverage might be immediately at hand. But in Japan, folks have taken a quantum leap forward in the refreshing-libation race.

This isn’t surprising; after all, Japanese companies pioneered the ancient bottle-with-marble drink, Calpis, and Pocari Sweat.

But the story takes a turn for the scandalous when it becomes clear that Japan’s blockbuster new summer refresher—a cucumber-based soda—is made by Pepsi.

Pepsi Ice Cucumber is a mint-colored beverage described by the AP as artificially flavored to resemble “the refreshing taste of a fresh cucumber.”

Well, that’s just great. First, compact cars. Then, consumer electronics. Now, new Pepsi rollouts. What’s next, a robot that can refrigerate, open, and serve cans of beer to its human masters?

Oh, wait.

Damn you, Land of the Rising Sun!

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