Come one! Come all! See the ageless burger! Still as “fresh” as the day it was pressed into service, this burger will stay young through the ages without the aid of Botox! It’s a miracle of science! Of preservatives! Of junk food!

Remember how we were all told that if we swallowed our gum, it would stay in our stomachs for 15 years? Somehow that doesn’t scare me as much as this website that supposedly chronicles how a McDonald’s burger stands the test of time.

According to Gael at Pop Culture Junk Mail, the story behind this site is:

A guy bought two McDonald’s burgers in 1989, ate one, put the other in his pocket for some reason (?) and forgot about it until he took that jacket out again a year later. Thanks to all the preservatives and artificial goodness, the burger had barely changed.

The Burger Museum has a Burger Cam where—much like the Panda Cams at the National Zoo—you can watch an adorable three-month-old burger take its first tottering steps in life.

You can also watch a hysterical YouTube video that relates the history of the museum and schools you on how to create your very own Burger Museum. For instance, did you know that you should not put your Burger Museum burgers in sealed containers? True story. Apparently, “The moisture needs to escape the food naturally, so letting them breathe in the open air works best.” Awesome.

Now if there were only hints on how to keep my cats from eating the exhibits …

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