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Making a vodka watermelon is easier than you think, so there’s no excuse not to try it this summer.

Watermelon cocktails are perfect for the warmer months—bright, light, sweet, and refreshing, they can go from juicy to slushy, and they’re all dangerously delicious. But if the idea of eating your alcohol sounds more amazing than terrifying, you’ve probably wondered how to achieve what seems like the impossible: a drunken watermelon.

Lucky for you, the impossible is possible with just a few supplies and a few easy steps. Soon enough, you’ll be well on your way to bringing the coolest item to a summer picnic (other than yourself, of course).

What You’ll Need: 

  • 1 large watermelon
  • 1 16 ounce bottle of alcohol (your choice, but typically vodka or tequila)
  • large bowl
  • cutting board
  • sharp knife
  • small spoon
  • funnel (optional)

1. Start by placing your watermelon on top of a cutting board and carefully cutting a circular hole at the top. You’ll want to ensure that the hole is slightly wider than the head of your alcohol bottle or funnel.

2. Tear off the rind and dig into the hole with your spoon. Remove at least four to five inches of flesh. Enjoy as an early treat.

3. Place the watermelon in a large bowl with the hole at the top.

4. Insert the bottle directly into the hole and allow the alcohol to drain into the watermelon. It may not drain entirely, in which case you can either leave your bottle in the hole or save the rest of the booze for the future. If you are using a funnel, pour the alcohol into it slowly until the contents of the bottle are empty (or the watermelon can’t handle more liquid).

5. Transfer the watermelon and bowl to the fridge. Store for at least 24 hours prior to serving. The longer the alcohol sits, the tastier it will be.

6. Once you’re ready to consume, simply slice your watermelon into half-inch thick segments or bite-sized pieces. Nosh responsibly.

Alternative Version: Hollow out the whole watermelon, fill it with a refreshing, batch-friendly cocktail (like a Watermelon Margarita, or a beer-and-watermelon Summer Hoedown, if you want to stay on theme), and add a tap for dispensing drinks.

Watermelon Tap Kit, $24.95 from Williams Sonoma

What a time to be alive.
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Easier Way: Cut a watermelon into cubes and soak them in booze:

Drunken Watermelon Pops

View Recipe

Don’t forget to try grilled watermelon too! And all our other watermelon recipes while summer produce is in its prime.

Related Video: How to Make a No-Waste Watermelon Gazpacho with Pickled Watermelon Rind

Joey is a NYC-based writer/editor, TV/radio personality, editor-at-large for Chowhound, author of "Basic Bitchen," and host of "Dish This." His work has been featured in outlets like Food & Wine, People, InStyle, Travel+Leisure, and BuzzFeed. Prior to a career in editorial, he served as the lead publicist for hit TLC shows like "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo," "My Strange Addiction," and "My Crazy Obsession." In his spare time, he enjoys volleyball, visiting the beaches of Naples, Fla. (his hometown), worshipping Beyoncé, eating sour candy, writing depressing poetry, interior design, and perfecting his stand-up comedy routine. He's also been struck by lightning—quite the shocking experience.
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