Sam Allis wrote a funny piece in today's Boston Globe disparaging the holiday bird in a mockingly playful way. The white meat of the turkey gets hit the hardest in his lampooning of the traditional feast.
A few vignettes:
"Today, I rise to address a subject that has tortured me for years: the tyranny of the turkey. Turkey has held us hostage on holidays for long enough..."
"For the record, turkey is dry, insufferably boring stuff."
"... at the end of the day, turkey still remains a dreary eating experience."
"My challenge today is for you to walk on the wild side for once in your pathetic holiday eating life." (My favorite line.)
He suggests some tremendous alternatives, including rib of beef with all the trimmings, a crown roast of pork , lobster and Italian.
Even funnier than Sam's 'turkey tyranny' piece, are the comments that follow calling him clueless, jaded, uneducated, curmudgen and the grinch.
Here's the full article:
As Garrison Keillor wrote, it's a peasant holiday where all you have to do is sit down and eat.
What are you having on Thursday? Enjoy the holiday.