Restaurants & Bars


Resto - Astonishingly Disappointing


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Restaurants & Bars Manhattan

Resto - Astonishingly Disappointing

millefeuille | | Jul 20, 2007 08:06 PM

Let's keep this one simple:

GF and I have had this on our list since the initial raves came in. As beer geeks, the place had extra appeal for us.

We arrived Friday evening (7/20) at 7:50. No wait. In fact, it's a "where would you like to sit" kind of situation.

Per Platt, Bruni, 'hounds et al., we order some bitter ballen while perusing the menu. I do not exaggerate when I say thay the liitle fried balls arrived in 90 seconds. They had clearly been par-fried and "refreshed" in the fry-o-lator just before service. They were unidimensional in flavor -- meaty with no contrast in texture to rescue the overly unctuous and fatty interior. The grainy mustard accompaniment was not dissimilar from Hellman's "dijonaise."

Deviled eggs and a burger to share was the decision. The deviled eggs were presented with similar alacrity to the ballen: this time was under two minutes. These were in desperate need of some sort of acid counterpoint to their muted, greasy texture. They were limpid and far inferior to the average backyard bbq variety (the fried pork pedestals they rested upon were indistinguishable from the ballen in their flavorlessness).

The burger -- lauded on these boards and in other critiques for its resplendent fattiness -- came to the table as grey as slate and resting unappetizingly on a Key Foods-caliber bun straight out of the supermarket bulk department. It was clearly dead on arrival. Fatally overcooked and inedibly dry, it gave way to a texture that suggested the addition of bread crumbs to the mix. There was no trace of the fatback that supposedly enriches these patties. Rather, it was easy to lay off and leave sitting on the plate next to the forlorn, far-from-frites frites.

Don't bother. The ship has sailed on this place. We won't be back and the odds on Resto lasting more than a year are slim.

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