I ate lobster at restaurants a few times recently, and I was surprised to get an argument from a waitress at one place when I asked her if the kitchen would pick the lobster for me.
I know how to pick a lobster. I do it at home, and I'd expect to do it at an "in the rough" kind of seafood restaurant in New England. The issue is that it's messy, and if I am eating at a fine dining restaurant, I think it's reasonable for the kitchen to pick the lobster on request. That also assumes there's no lazy man's lobster or other dish I could choose if I didn't want to mess with the actual whole lobster.
Most places do it, no questions asked. At this once place over the summer, the waitress said the kitchen wouldn't do it because they're too busy. I pressed the issue, and she said she'd ask. They ended up picking it for me. I was very pleased.
At an ethnic restaurant recently, I got a lobster curry. While the lobster was served in the shell, the kitchen had cut it up in such a way that it was not a mess to pick and eat. This seemed reasonable to me too.
What do you think?