I invited my family for Christmas dinner, when asked if they needed to bring anything I informed them all to bring their beverages of choice, as I have all the food taken care of. My sister-in-law informed me yesterday she was bringing a ham - not some ham - an HALF ham. After my initial shock of the what I perceived to be rude (bringing the main dish that is not part of my menu) I thanked her and reminded her we don't eat pork. To which she replied she was bringing it to serve with what I am making and offered a side as well. In channeling my Mother I thanked her and gave up trying to make sense of this woman.
Said sister-in-law informed me this morning she is bringing a potato casserole (with all sorts of dairy products in it that I can't eat). I informed her that her dish will go great with the potatoes I am serving and that they sounded yummy and have since ignored all other text messages (as she doesn't call people she texts them).
If you are invited to a dinner party is it ok to bring the main course and a side dish after you have been informed by the hostess that nothing is necessary beyond your beverage of choice? Or am I being upset unnecessarily by someone's generosity in providing a meal that my family can't/won't eat instead of the lovely (and expensive) meal that I have chosen to serve?
Thank you all for you help - and responses as to how I can 1) prevent this from happening in the future and 2) not shoving that ham somewhere where a polite hostess shouldn't be thinking.
By the way - there are no food allergies or vegan issues in the family and this is the second time she has decided what the whole family is going to eat for dinner when invited to my home. The last time it was bbq wings and she took her children to McDonald's to eat.