Ode to a Cereal Filler

South Florida’s Sun-Sentinel has assembled an awe-inspiring collection of photographs of out-of-print breakfast cereal boxes.

Ranging from Quisp to Pink Panther Flakes to Baron von Redberry, the display runs the gamut from the silly to the ridiculous, embracing, along the way, a pro-sugar attitude that would be less than welcome in most modern-day households.

A handful of highlights for the criminally lazy:

The o’s in Kellogg’s Cocoa Hoots are located on an unfortunate part of the mascot owl’s anatomy.

The eye contact being made between Cap’n Crunch and the Punch Crunch pink hippo raises more questions than it answers vis-à-vis everyone’s sexual orientation.

Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs is a strangely unnerving—no, downright terrifying—name for anything, let alone something your kids are supposed to eat.

You can bet that Melville never planned for the white whale to pop up on a box of Vanilly Crunch wearing bright red “do me” lipstick.

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