Binge Across America

Many touring rock bands can’t afford to consume too many calories on the road. More often than not, a successful run through America’s indie circuit is fueled by a meager diet of Taco Bell bean burritos, with an occasional box of Ho Hos as a special treat. But Herb Wiley, a slim guitarist who plays with Jersey City’s Black Hollies, definitely isn’t dying of starvation.

The band’s tour food blog, Diary of a Foodman: The Amazing Consumption of Herbert Joseph Wiley V, lists everything Wiley eats each day on the road, and seriously, the dude can eat. A typical day looks something like this:

Start Time: 6AM EST

1 Naked Green Machine Superfood Drink

2 Eggs Over Medium

1 Morning Star Vegetarian Sausage Patty w/ side of Potatoes, Peppers, and Onions

1.5 Cups of Black Coffee

1 Quorn Vegetarian Turkey Sandwich on Two Slices of Whole Grain Bread w/ Mayonnaise

3 Baby Gherkin Pickles

1 Raw Revolution Power Bar

1 Banana

2 Spirulina Pills

1 Serving of Dried Apricots

1 Bag of Ukon gold Potato Chips

1 Slice of Pizza

1 Cup of Chicken Vegetable Soup in a Beef Broth

1 Vegetarian Burger w/ side of French Fries

2 Pints of Blue Moon Ale

End Time: 10:30PM EST

If you are what you eat, then what is Herb Wiley? He seems like a vegetarian, until he slurps down some chicken soup in beef broth—between a slice of pizza and a veggie burger. Maybe he’s a health nut, but who washes down spirulina pills and dried apricots with a bag of potato chips? His food diary, which is actually written by Black Hollies bandmate Jon Gonnelli (whose nom de plume is Palestinian Bluetooth), doesn’t answer these questions.

However, it does illustrate some of Wiley’s on-the-road culinary adventures, like learning to make a fried peanut butter and jelly sandwich from a chef/musician in Cleveland. The blog also documents some of Wiley’s interesting insights along the way. Here’s one quote that most food-lovers can relate to: “Life is a bowl of cherries with whipped cream, chocolate ice cream, a side of toast, two eggs over easy, and a pocket full of gas.”

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