Beer-a-Pult

When I was in college, the guys I knew were all about the kegerator. Not merely a place to refrigerate and dispense beer from a tap shoved in the door, this thing also had tubes running all over to various rooms in the house—upstairs, downstairs, in m’lady’s chamber—so Bob and Doug McKenzie would only have to shift their mouths slightly to get a drink.

That was child’s play compared to this Duke grad, who takes beer-fueled slothfulness to a sublime new level. Missing the hazy, lazy days of college, software engineer John Cornwell decided to recapture his recent youth by inventing and building a fridge that catapults a beer to his couch with the press of button.

With a click of the remote, fashioned from a car’s keyless entry device, a small elevator inside the refrigerator lifts a beer can through a hole and loads it into the fridge’s catapult arm. A second click fires the device, tossing the beer up to 20 feet — “far enough to get to the couch,” he said.

Think you might have to deal with a foam bath after such a catapultous event? Nope, according to Cornwell, you should use “soft hands” when catching your brewsky.

Cornwell admits that before he perfected his beer-a-pult, he had to deal with some incidentals like dented walls and nearly smashing his TV. You know, nothing that any Wii owner isn’t intimately familiar with already.

I have to say that after watching the Beer Launcher in action, the only thing I could think of was, “I could walk to my kitchen and get a beer faster than that!” And I know I have a small apartment, but I really think my impatience for a beer would override my lazy Bass.

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